Don’t lose yourself by living someone else’s life…

It’s been quite some time since I last wrote a blog post and there are loads of reasons for that! I’ve been really busy with work, friends and an array of other situations! But, in these months, I’ve felt like a part of me has been suppressed and that was really holding me back from being 100% content with my life at any given time. No matter what happens, who comes or goes, there will always be a missing piece of the puzzle. That missing puzzle piece is what we need to rediscover and hold on to because that is usually dictates our quality of life in a way that no other being or material can do. It screams individuality.

I was reminded by a friend yesterday how I hadn’t written a blog post in ages and how they missed reading what I write because it was inspiring to them. It made me think that THIS is what I was neglecting and if you know me well enough, you know that writing is a huge emotional outlet for me and it’s the best way I know how to express myself.

The last few months have been fairly rough and a bit of a rollercoaster and I haven’t been writing to release all of that frustration that I didn’t have time to pay any attention to and I regret that. Had I been writing, maybe I’d have been a lot more positive going through those things but also been more involved in other areas of my life.

Note: NEVER neglect the one thing that you know makes you sane in darker times. It doesn’t end well, believe me.

I guess the moral of the story is, always be true to who you are no matter who comes in to (and leaves) your life. No matter how busy we get on a day to day basis, we should always find time to do the things that make us feel human again. Working long days in the city and not being your full fun loving self can be draining and we should always ensure that our mind is as healthy as our body. Without your mind, your body is futile!

With that said, I’m going to try to write more again because it’s what I LOVE to do! Any topical suggestions are welcome and hopefully you’ll be seeing more of me again 😊

What does it mean?

I know it’s been a long time since my last blog post and there is good reason for that. Everyone has been asking me whether or not I’ll write more posts or whether my blog will become inactive.

The simple answer is yes, I do plan on posting more but only when I find meaning in what I write. If you’ve read all my previous posts, you’ll notice I write about things that provoke emotion and thought in me – that’s when I feel most creative and expressive. To me, writing is an art.

Can art really inspire if it has no meaning?

I’d like to think most of you would agree with me when I say that it shouldn’t even be given the title of art if there is no substance or depth behind it.

So really, this post is twofold. To explain why I haven’t posted and also as a subject for the content of this post. Often we find ourselves doing routine tasks and social activities without really thinking twice about why we are engaging in them.

How frequently do those who are the ‘busiest’ amongst us think about why they are so busy and if we really NEED to devote a significant portion of our time to meaningless activity? It may not seem meaningless at the time of scheduling, but I tend to find that, in hindsight, many of the big blocks in my diary can easily be avoided just by the question of why.

Imagine your typical week. Do you feel fulfilled at the end of the day on a Sunday? Ready to go back to work on Monday knowing that you’ve accomplished something in that week? Are that one step closer to achieving that healthy equilibrium in life?

If you answered yes, then good on you! You’re obviously in a better position than me and probably the majority of young adults who are trying to find the same equilibrium you have.

If you’re like me and you’re not quite ready to answer yes to all those questions, then we need to find a way to restructure our time so we can feel in control of our lifestyle and the positive returns on the activities we engage in.

I’m afraid I don’t actually have the fix to this. The way we reach an equilibrium in our lives and indeed the point of equilibrium itself is different for all of us. We must ensure that we are thinking twice, maybe even three times, before we offer ourselves up to anything and everything to ‘pass time’ or ‘keep up an appearance’.

Going into 2018, I urge you all to find meaning in what you do and restrict your activities to those with purpose and depth. I strongly believe you’ll feel more accomplished and positive about the growth you’ll see in the year to come.

So I’m too much for you, huh? 👋

Over the last few years, I have been repeatedly told that I am ‘too much’. Whether it is too ‘enthusiastic’ or too ‘opinionated’ or too ‘trusting’ or too ‘excitable’. To me, these are the most important attributes to hold but are also those I rarely come by. Take a look at my friendship circle and you’ll see this is something I require in my company. 

For a long time, it made me feel as if I was giving too much of my energy and personality to others with negligible returns and unwarranted criticism. I felt like I was being told not to be me in an effort to be liked (something I don’t struggle with imo) *blows own trumpet*

Surely, you can’t help but be who you are?

I tried to hold back, tone down my opinions and sometimes avoid situations where I KNOW I would have voiced my opinions without a second thought. This all happened to no avail.

I slowly realised that I am who I am and there are people in this world that give life everything they have and try to make light of every single difficult situation. There are also people in this world who are happy to let life strike them time and time again – not a problem. You won’t find me telling you that you are ‘not enough’. So, please don’t tell me I’m ‘too much’. We clearly place quality of life on a different rank in our criteria for a successful life.

As of this moment in 2017, positivity is rare. There isn’t enough of it in the world. If you can’t see the humour in tough situations, you are succumbing to fear and silence. You are spreading your legs for the world. You are literally letting life take you by the horns. The following message is mostly for those who complain. I understand that some people genuinely don’t enjoy humour like that. But those who complain about others being full of life and energy – fuck you 🖕🏻

Don’t dim someone else’s light just because yours went out. To those who are told to ‘calm down’ – don’t. Why should anyone else have an influence on your personality and the level of energy you would like to commit to everything you do? 

To all the ‘glass half full’ people out there – YOU are what is good in this world and it’s people like you that make the world a better place to live in. Carry on being amazing and don’t let the haters rain on your parade. They have no life, so what light can we expect from them? 

Neoliberalism Exposed #Justice4Grenfell

The last few months have had me living on edge, with Twitter at my fingertips and the UK News at the forefront of my mind and google search history. 

There has been immense change in this country over this period and I don’t think anyone had had a chance to sit back, recuperate and really understand where we stand as a now ‘openly divided’ country. I can only give you my stance on this as I don’t claim to be an academic writer, just opinions so that’s what I’ll do!

Over the last few months, we have seen terrorist attack upon terrorist attack upon terrorist attack. This week, we saw the deeply saddening and unforgivable (yes you, North Kensington Council) fire blaze across Grenfell Tower leaving few survivors and many casualties and no doubt, fatalities.

The surge of terrorist attacks in the last few months came as we edged closer to the snap election and Theresa May’s embarrassing and historical loss. She failed to win a majority but more importantly – failed to prove herself as a capable leader much less a human (and continues to prove that evil muppets run our country).

So what’s actually changed?

Firstly, I truly believe that the youth and the working class have found a voice. They may not be able to voice it directly – unfortunately the country voted to keep them voiceless. But, they found confidence and solace in a leader that could do that for them and was on a similar human level. Jeremy Corbyn, haters will hate. Please continue to represent freedom and equality. We are with you.

Secondly, those who hadn’t seen through Theresa May initially (for whatever reason – no judgements), have now seen her true character and what she really represents. The run up to the election and the last few weeks have really shown who she is. A pathetic, selfish and extremely incompetent woman who fails to take responsibility for the country she chooses to lead. Anyone who can’t see the Trump in Theresa needs to wake up and smell the tyranny. 

But fear not! Despite the uncovering of the PM’s disgusting character, we have also discovered that the British public is not one to sit back and give up. The terrible bombings in Manchester and London are homage to this. London saw no one stop doing what they do on a daily basis. People went back to work the next day, London did not come to a standstill. This is the nature of the working class that deserves representation. They work their asses off contributing to this country and have the bravest, no f***s given attitude even in the most difficult of times. Throw any one of them into parliament and they’d represent a fairer system than Theresa May any day.  

Last but not least, we have discovered that our emergency services have responded in an absolutely heroic manner over the period of these attacks. This week’s blaze in the Grenfell Tower really proved how undervalued our Fire Service really is! They risk their lives on a daily basis to save the lives of hundreds and are humble and unnecessarily apologetic when they feel they have not been able to save everyone (see heartbreaking message below). They are inspirational people and they are NOT valued enough by the leadership and in decisions of wealth distribution in this country. Let’s talk about it…

          

Finally, something that has become more and more apparent over the last few days is the fatal withholding of important information and irreversible abuse of power by those in positions of ‘authority’.

I, and my fellow aware individuals, refuse to believe that there is only a death count in the double digits after a blaze spread through a building housing 600 residents! Why is there a huge excess of donations with no one to make use of them? Why are some centres for those that have been displaced empty? Is it because they are in hospital? NO. Is it because they have found their families and been taken in? NO. It’s because the majority of these 600 residents are most likely dead in a fire that spread due to gross negligence on the part of the council and the government. It makes me sick to think that this government still hopes that we will believe that 10% of residents died and the rest are ‘missing’. Do NOT insult families and communities like that. 

They deserve to know.

Questions need to be answered. Families need to be given reparations, and fast. People need to see justice – this was not just a fire. This was an act of deliberate displacement of a humble underclass from no doubt one of the richest boroughs in the country. Justice will be served.

For those who are still happy with the leadership at this point in UK politics (and indeed this post) please tell me why you are happy with a government that rips families apart with the sharp knife of neoliberalism and had the audacity to hide in their sanctuaries when millions of displaced individuals come looking for answers.

Tell me why you are perfectly content living in a country run by snobs who refuse to take a minute out of their supposedly ‘busy’ schedule to empathise and answer your questions.

Tell me why the public of this country can raise circa £2million in donations in 24 hours but the leadership that you support can only set aside a measly £5million to compensate families. 

Spend £10million on a makeover of a seemingly deliberately unsafe block, and spend £5million to rehouse, reclothe, reinstate and recover families? That is insulting and abominable. 

So, we have to come to learn a lot about our country and it’s leadership over the last few months. If you didn’t have time to process it, I think you should take a minute and see where you think this country has gone wrong and see if you actually have something to say about the way politics has dealt with humans recently. 

Lost and Found

I found in me,

What you lacked in you.

You came to see,

What I had to lose.

So please don’t ask me,

If I am going to choose

You over me,

We both know the truth.

Bridges burned.

Tables turned.

For you I had lived,

To me,  I’ve returned.

The End

Stuck in the middle,

Escape is nothing but a distant dream.

Mistreated, Misunderstood, Misguided.

Where did I go wrong?

What did I not do for you?

Love, Life, Lost.

I can see the past in tomorrow,

The present, very much a blur.

Repeat, Retaliate, Repair.

That is all we will ever do.

This is The End.

It’s not me, it’s you 👉🏼

Have you ever been in a situation where you’re helping someone at the expense of your mental stability? A situation where you can no longer mentally endure the ‘hand-holding’? A situation where the more you are there for someone, the less you have to give to yourself?

I’m here to tell you, that’s normal and it’s not just you! You and your sanity are much more important than anyone else could ever be. Believe me. If you find yourself becoming someone’s oxygen and their voice of reason for the good, the bad and the ugly in life, then you need to distance yourself. 

This is a toxic way to live and soon or later, you’ll feel so drained it will make you question your own ability to please another and send you into a downward spiral of insecurity. Focus on yourself. 

The phrase ‘I’m doing me’ has never made more sense. If someone is taking up all of your time, energy and mental space then you need to reconsider their position in your life. In fact, the problem here is your position in THEIR life. Some people will place you at the forefront of everything they feel and do. While that may seem endearing to some, I find that to be extremely unhealthy and a loss of independence, decision-making power and self-worth.

So, think about those people who want you to hold their hand through life. Think about whether or not you’re still giving yourself the love and attention you once did. If you are experiencing a significant attention-deficit coming from yourself, you need to know that the consequences are dire and you need to reassess the circumstances you are facing.

Please remember to give yourself 100% before you decide to give your energy and mental headspace to another. If you feel they are draining you and leeching off your positivity, remove yourself from the equation. 

Mental health is important – stay sane and love yourself.

Shoutout to the Youth 👏🏻

The suspense is over. Results are in. The dust has settled and I am pleased to be able to say we have all collectively made a dent in UK politics. We, the public, have dragged the UK back in to two-party politics. Well done to us.

Jeremy Corbyn may not have won the majority, but he has definitely weakened Theresa May and the Tories – more than she had weakened herself throughout this election. Personally, this election speaks volumes about the demographics of this country and the passion that young people have for the future of their country!

I was pleasantly surprised by the number of young people that came out and voted – something we haven’t seen much in the past. It just shows how much our generation really can shape this country. We are what is holding this country together. If just voting for a fairer Britain can create a huge impact like this, imagine what we can do if we all actively became more politically savvy and took responsibility for the future of the UK. 

Opinions should be voiced at every opportunity. This is the best opportunity to fight for what is right! I just wanted to say thank you to all those who went out of their way to register to vote in this election – you’ve proved that taking those steps down to your polling station can make every bit of a difference. 

Today, I can say I’m proud to be part of a class of individuals who have shown that they stand for a fairer Britain and will always fight for what is right. Let this be the start of a revolution in British politics and eventually, a more equal society!

This hung parliament is dangling from the noose of its young working class! The power to make change will always be in our hands. 

I am proud to be British. More importantly, I am proud to be YOUNG and British in a time where being young matters. A time where being young is an opportunity to make a change. Embrace it and never stop fighting for what is right. An equal society for one and all. 

Time is Money

His mind; burdened with the future,

The past on his shoulders.

Running from his fiery Past

into the Future,

where money and happiness are abundant 

– or so he has been told.

Through the mist of the Present, 

a place where no man will

Stop.

And breathe. 

Beauty is not uncommon here. 

Overshadowed by greed,

nothing to do but join

the Race.

Chasing money and material seems to

be the path most trodden,

I mean –

does there exist another?

Spoken Word Review 🗣

Recently, I’ve found myself looking at and being in awe of poets around the world engaging in Spoken Word.

I am a huge advocate for this amazing creative space and I highly recommend anyone with an interest in politics and poetry to get into this!

One piece in particular that has really stuck with me ever since I watched it a few weeks ago, is an extremely powerful performance by an 18 year old Indian girl who goes by the name of Aranya Johar. 

Click on the link below to watch this masterpiece:

A brown girl’s guide to gender – Aranya Johar

She speaks from the bottom of her heart and through several experiences. These are  experiences no human should have to go through. These are feelings no one should be made to feel. I can only imagine how mentally crippling it is for a young female to walk to school knowing that stepping outside exposes her to rape, sexualisation and a massive gender gap that she just can’t escape. 

The worst part about this is that it happens in what is meant to be the safest place for young girls – home. Absolutely disgusting.

Females are sexualised from the moment they are old enough to be on their own. It disgusts me and requires immense public attention to combat these issues. 

This is a very important spoken word piece that is explored very articulately and passionately. Aranya spares no feelings in her ‘brown girl’s guide to gender’, spitting bars of truth on the gender inequality and female sexualisation in India. A must-watch, especially if you think gender equality isn’t ‘too much of an issue’. 

Feminism is not a movement, it’s an attitude that unfortunately is not intrinsic to society. It is an attitude that reflects humanity, equality and ethics. Just take a look at the video for yourselves and see how you feel at the end! 

Enjoy 🙌🏼